My one little word for 2014 is MOVE. As I’ve explained before it’s multi faceted in my life. I need to physically move more, we have to move out of this house this year or i’ll go crazy and there are some things that I need to move on from too. Including a number of friendships.
The question is how do you know when it’s time to stop investing in a friendship? To move on from people who were such a huge part of your life? It’s something that’s been troubling me for the last few months because I know I need to do it, it’s just hard to make that concious decision isn’t it. I know that everyone changes with time and that lives just move apart, but it’s so sad when people you thought were great friends drift away, with no explanation. Especially when they are people you’ve put before others when prioritising your time.
I have friends who if I don’t see for months at a time, it’s like nothing has changed. I have friends who I don’t bat an eyelid about if it takes them 3 weeks to reply to a text (because they don’t worry when I do the same) and I have friends who I know when something huge comes up I can call upon and they’ll be there for me unconditionally. I know I am very lucky with this and it’s been proved in recent weeks with the support I’ve been getting.
But I’ve also spent time in the last few years surrounding myself with people who it turns out are probably the wrong people. They aren’t the ones who I’ve turned to in the last month when I’ve needed to hear a friendly voice or just have a bit of a chat (even the ones who have no idea that I’ve need their help have still made things a little better!) I haven’t turned to them because even though once upon a time they’d have known everything about me I know I’m just not a priority to them any more and whilst it makes me sad and I do miss them, it’s also made me re-evaluate the people that I give my time to and I think that can only be a good thing right?
How do you know when it’s time to move on from people? Is it something that creeps up on you or hits when you realise they aren’t the person you feel you can call for a chat, for a night out, for lunch or a little bit of help any more?