On being 33.

February 10, 2014 25 Comments

Last month I turned 33. Gah, 33, I can barely say it. It sounds so, old.
Really, really, old.

I know that 30 is the age that you’re meant to have the issues with, but well 33 is bothering me more. It sounds like the sort of age where you ought to have your shit figured out, doesn’t it. It sounds like the sort of age you should be maybe married, and you should certainly have kids. Hell, you should have at least a house and have your finances sorted. Or at least be able to walk in heels. And feel happy in your own skin. But somehow all of that has slipped by me.

I can’t ‘do’ the heels thing. I’m more a fan of Converse. In fact my wardrobe isn’t that of what I suspect it should be of a 33 year old. I’d rather be in jeans and a sweater than some fancy designer outfit. We’re trying to buy a house, it’s just taking a really long time. And I’ve never really been the marrying sort – I never dreamt about them as a kid, and, well, the thought of having one for me, it terrifies me. The party planning required sounds pretty fun though. And I never really saw myself with children of my own, I thought maybe adopting would one day be for me, but not pregnancy. But we do have Flash, who is our little star (Although people with kids don’t really understand that I love him like they love their little brats.) And I am trying to change the not being comfortable. There have been diet changes and exercising.

But despite all the things that my life isn’t quite yet, I’m pretty happy with it so this slight freak out about the being 33 has hit me out of no-where really. 

I turned 33 in a slightly understated fashion – on a Tuesday, with a morning at work and a long walk with Flash and then a slightly drunken meal in the evening, and cake, then back to work the next day. We had a get together the weekend before with some of my favourite Sheffield people and more cake and gin and fizz and a bar station and a sequinned top and a lot of laughs and some cake on face action.

I’m just hoping it doesn’t take me all year to become OK with being 33. 


  • missie cindz February 10, 2014 at 7:19 am

    Happy belated birthday Em (a month late 🙂 x

    • Emma February 10, 2014 at 2:22 pm

      Thanks lovely. Hopefully see you at the next Puddin Club. x

  • Anonymous February 10, 2014 at 8:26 am

    I've never managed to figure out the whole heel thing & i'm without a doubt a more jeans and hoodie girl, i'm alright with that though because goodness me it is sooo much more comfy and I love my converse. I'm totally with you on the whole children scenario as well, my pugs are just perfect for now and when it does come to having children, maybe one day, well I was adopted, as was my Dad and it would be sad not to keep up the family tradition. 😉 xx

    • Emma February 10, 2014 at 2:25 pm

      That is an awesome tradition to keep up! Love it. And love that you're with me on the flats and jeans front too! x

  • Zoe February 10, 2014 at 11:08 am

    I hear you! I'm 33 and I have no idea what I want to be when I grow up. This really really REALLY bothers me now – much more than it did when I turned 30.

    • Emma February 10, 2014 at 2:25 pm

      It's strange isn't it – 33 sounds sooooo much older than 30 but I don't feel it. x

  • Elizabeth @ Rosalilium February 10, 2014 at 12:49 pm

    I'm right behind ya! I know exactly what you mean. My solution is to not think about the age at all and just think about your life and your own journey and being happy with that.

    • Emma February 10, 2014 at 2:26 pm

      It's tough to not think about the age when people bring it up all the time. I might start telling them they have it wrong and go back to 28 😉 x

  • Unknown February 10, 2014 at 1:00 pm

    It sounds like you had a good time for your birthday. I don't think 33 is old at all and it seems like you are doing what you want with your life which is better than having done a bunch of things just because you think you "should" do them.

    • Emma February 10, 2014 at 2:27 pm

      Thank you. I've never been much good at doing things because I should. I think I'm only up for this house buying thing so I have somewhere to make pretty 😉 x

  • widdle and puke February 10, 2014 at 1:27 pm

    33 is my next birthday and I'm feeling the same. I'm happy with my lot (also have a pup) and a great set of mates but I'm pretty sure I should be wearing power suits with rad shoulder pads and driving a car that doesn't smell like wet dog. Was that your birthday cake? It looks amazing x

    • Emma February 10, 2014 at 2:29 pm

      Ah, power suits with shoulder pads – that sounds like a great outfit……..maybe we should all go with it! The car cleaners laugh at the amount mud and dog hair that gets everywhere in my car – they can get rid of that but not the faint smell of dog!
      And yes, my mum made me my favourite carrot cake and found that topper in a box so decided to use it to shame my age! x

  • BA February 10, 2014 at 3:44 pm

    Happy birthday! I hope that you comes to terms with your age and that you have the best year ever – as long as you're happy what else matters! We all have different paths to take and yours sounds like you've got it all sorted in your mind 🙂 x

    • Emma February 11, 2014 at 7:57 pm

      Lets go with having the plan almost half way sorted. And Thank you. x

  • Unknown February 10, 2014 at 7:39 pm

    Belated happy birthday! You may feel unsure about it but it sounds like you know what you like and you know what you don't want… which is half the battle.
    Be ok with it soon dude!
    M x Life Outside London

    • Emma February 11, 2014 at 7:58 pm

      I'ver certainly figured out what I don't like. I know that for sure 😉 I'm sure I'll get there soon! x

  • Keenie Beanie February 10, 2014 at 8:18 pm

    Happy belated birthday, Em! I struggled with my age every year though my 30s, but I turned 40 last year not too long after my daughter was born, and I haven't had any time to mope about it since then. My life is definitely not put together the way I thought it should be by now (in fact it's a bigger mess at 40 than it was at 30) but I've finally learned how to let it go and go with the flow. I think you're doing just fine. 🙂

    • Emma February 11, 2014 at 7:59 pm

      Oh crap, don't tell me it doesn't get easier in your 40's 😉 I'm guessing that beautiful little girl has kept you pretty busy. x

  • Audrey February 11, 2014 at 9:05 am

    Happy Birthday! Mine's on the 27! Hope you had a blast!

    • Emma February 11, 2014 at 8:00 pm

      Cheers, you too. x

  • Unknown February 11, 2014 at 5:47 pm

    Happy Birthday! I'm having the same issue with 29 that I shall in 2 weeks. I think it's because it's the precursor to 30 and I'm pretty sure I am going to freak out when I turn 30. So, what, it's the freak out before the freak out?! Who knows. But this is why giving you my words of wisdom (read: glaringly obvious insight) makes me feel like a hypocrite because I don't follow my own advice. Which is to try not to compare yourself to others and what they're doing. It does sound like even when you do the comparison thing, you still come up smiling. : ) so try to get that 33 mojo. Throw expectations to the wind and focus on enjoying the journey! I hope the house-buying adventure speeds up.

    Jen | gingerellaj.blogspot.co.uk

    • Emma February 11, 2014 at 8:02 pm

      One bit of 29 wisdom I have for you is to not wish it away. If anyone asks you how old you are say 29, not 'nearly 30!' That was something a friend told me. It made it better. And I'll give your words of wisdom a go, but in this age of social media it's so hard not to see how everyone else's lives are doing too.

      Have a wonderful 29th year. x

  • Cate February 12, 2014 at 12:25 pm

    I think everyone must have a my-life-is-not-perfect freak out at some point, it normal! I realised while I was freaking out about the things I hadn't done/didn't have, that my best mate was too, and all she wanted was what I had. I just had to learn to chill out and appreciate my life…. it's a work in progress, but i'm finding my happy now! Oh and i'm totally with you on the heels thing – no, just no! Aaaand Happy Belated Birthday! x

  • Chiara February 14, 2014 at 1:54 pm

    I'm turning 30 this year and I have to say it is bothering me. I can't quite put my finger on why, but it is. And you're the first person I've ever come across that feels the same way about kids. I think I want them, but I don't really ever want to fall pregnant. A predicament it is. But anyway, happy belated birthday. I loved the sound of your celebratory evening – cake, dinner and booze is always a good thing!x

  • duck in a dress February 16, 2014 at 4:03 pm

    I know I'm a bit late but Happy Birthday! I hope you had a lovely day and please don't worry too much about being 33 – like everyone else has said, you don't need to measure yourself against anyone else (or society), just make your own path doing whatever feels right to you! 🙂 x (ps. I can't walk in heels either)

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